GaryPaulsenish Sentences
by dobbyfan18
Summary: Are you sick of Neville being the little oddball without a girlfriend? Well, I am, and that inspired this story. Step right in for the NevilleOC romance of a lifetime! {a very G-ish PG, PG only to be safe. Title barely has to do with the story.} R


A/N: This fic was inspired by the fact that in all the "survey" fics I read, Neville always has to say, "Single or taken? (sigh) single" or "girlfriend: none; I never realized how unlucky I was until now". Don't get me wrong, those are great fics, but I just think that Neville deserves a girlfriend. And no, I'm not jumping on the OotP bandwagon; I've thought that since before June 21, 2003.  
Dedicated to the real Amanda Hilligas, for donating her name. Well, so I didn't really ask her permission, but I'm sure that if I had, she would have been honored.  
Also dedicated to arx512, aka Jess, aka "insensitive prick" lol!... because I said so!  
There was a fourth Gryffindor girl in Harry's year. She was rarely noticed by anyone, but still she was there.  
There was one person who did notice her, however.  
That person was Neville. Neville Longbottom.  
One typical Saturday afternoon at Hogwarts, Neville was walking to the library and playing the world's smallest violin (no, really.  
The world's smallest violin.  
Why? Simply because the author was writing in short, disjointed, Gary Paulsen-ish sentences. Not that he had anything against Gary Paulsen. No. He just didn't like those sentences being applied to him.  
The same typical Saturday afternoon at Hogwarts, Amanda Hilligas, the fourth Gryffindor girl, was strolling back from the Owlery and singing a sad opera for exactly the same reason.  
A sad opera.  
The world's smallest violin.  
And a crash.  
The violin was dented and the opera was cut short as there was an ear-splitting crash and the author stopped using Gary Paulsen-ish sentences. Neville gasped and Amanda put on a Santa hat as they lay side by side on the floor. Well, not exactly side by side; Amanda's head was at Neville's feet and vice versa. Neville inspected the damage to the world's smallest violin; it was an heirloom, after all, and he had gotten it from his Great-Auntie Enid. Amanda applied a Repairing Charm as she wondered whether she would ever be able to sing properly again. Neville... well, he actually couldn't do anything about it, but her vocal chords recovered anyway.  
The two sat up and smiled weakly at each other.  
"Sorry -- thanks." "Thanks -- sorry." Those were said simultaneously, shortly before Neville broke into a wide grin at the sight of the Santa hat that was perched lopsidedly on Amanda's darkish blond hair. He adjusted it, tugged it a little to the left, and announced, "There! Now you could pass for an insane model." Amanda smiled at the compliment (insane, that is, not model). You could drown in those hazel eyes, she thought. But then she realized that they could hardly sit there all day, being a roadblock for the group of Ravenclaws that was approaching.  
"Well," she said, breaking the comfortable silence.  
"Yeah. I've -- er -- got to go to the library. Potions homework, you know..." announced Neville.  
"You mean that Ôcurative properties of earwig abdomens' essay?" asked Amanda; her companion nodded. "Great, I still have to finish that, too!" "D'you think Snape would mind that we did it together?" "Probably, but still, what's a few points off Gryffindor any day for a little bit of company on the weekend?" "You're right. And besides, all we have to do is ask Harry to hand Professor Sprout a watering can again and we'll have the points back with interest in no time, right?" "Right," laughed Amanda. She had to dash up to her dormitory to get her Potions stuff, and Neville went with and waited in the common room. He realized he still had some sugar quills left from the humongous package Gran had sent him for Christmas, and by the time Amanda was back down with her textbook, he was too.  
"Great idea," she said, "Madam Pince won't even notice, since they're Sugar QUILLS!" Neville beamed.  
  
-- time passes, and ff . net won't let me use astericks --  
  
An hour later, Amanda and Neville were both hunched over sheets of parchment at a table in the library, occasionally reaching out to grab their respective Sugar Quill, since they weren't actually writing with them.  
"DONE!" Neville declared, severely startling some nearby second years.  
"What? You can't be done already, he wants two feet and you know he measures the height of each row of handwriting!" "Oh," said Neville sheepishly. "Well, actually, I completely forgot about the essay. But... I did draw this..." He held up a sketch of what was unmistakably Professor Snape, but with a blue mustache (shaded in with blue ink) and holding a pickle.  
"You drew that? That's really good!" said Amanda.  
"Really?" asked Neville. He'd actually never shown his drawings to anyone before.  
"Yeah, where'd you learn?" "I don't know, I usually just draw when I'm bored... Gran did show me some paintings that my dad did once, though. They were pretty good." "Your gran showed you? Why didn't your dad show you himself?" "Well..." said Neville, looking a bit upset. "He was an Auror, and..." "Oh, I'm so sorry!" cried Amanda. "I just thought... Well... I... so your parents are dead?" she ended, whispering.  
"No," said Neville hollowly. "They're in St. Mungo's." With that, Amanda slumped over, her face in her hands. Neville could tell she had burst into tears by the way her shoulders were shaking. Leaning closer, he heard her murmuring about doom, despair, and Dilly Bars.  
Horrified but determined to make her feel better, Neville walked around the table and pulled out the chair beside Amanda.  
"Listen..." he said softly, putting an arm around her shoulders.  
"Leave me alone," she said abruptly, pulling her head up. "Now that I've reminded you of that you'll just be upset with me and now you'll never want to go out with me and..." "G-go out wi-with you?" Neville stammered.  
"I knew it," Amanda sniffled. "You'd never do it in a million years, would you?" "OF course I would! Besides... the Healers reckon they've found a new cure for Mum and Dad. Maybe, if it works, they'll be back to normal in fifteen years." "Fifteen years?" "Yeah, and that's really not that long if you think about what they've been through. So... do you want to go to Hogsmeade with me next time there's a trip?" "S-sure," Amanda hiccupped.  
At that moment, Madam Pince swooped down on them, demanding that they go elsewhere if they weren't using her precious books. She thrust said books into Neville's arms despite what she had said (in the process, nearly concussing him with a particularly thick volume entitled "Random Insects That Inhabit the Flowers That Hagrid Gives to Harry When Harry Is In The Hospital Wing After Fighting You-Know-Who in his First Year and Their Uses In Medical Potion-Making"), swept everything else off the table into Amanda's bag, practically threw the bag at her, and shooed them out of the library.  
"And as for you..." said the librarian, turning to the group of second years. They flinched.  
"You've been remarkably quiet and treated the books well. I think that deserves some house points," she continued, giving them a rare smile, "What house are you in?" Relieved, they responded, "Ravenclaw." A/N: Well, I think that was quite good, myself. But I dunno, I'm not really a specialist at not-entirely-random fics. So, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE review and tell me what you think! Also, I have some ideas, so tell me if you want more as well! Oh yeah, and this is set before OotP, other than that I have no clue, maybe the first part of third year? insert shrug here  
Disclaimer: I own it all! MUA-ha-ha-ha-ha!!! -cough cough- No, please don't sue me, I didn't mean it! Hey, don't drag me off, I'm trying to talk here! I don't WANNA go to jail... REVIIIEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWW..... And it STILL clumps paraghraphs together... I thought they fixed that... 


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